There are so many qualities about a person that we should consider, but normally the first thing that we are attracted to is how that person looks, many times even before we know the person we have made a decision about them. This is a big part of selection. We select those exterior qualities and at first, ignore the inner qualities. The qualities that we either ignored, overlooked, or actually thought were cute, are now driving us insane. How can you fall in love with that person again (This is done in a way that both partners can effectively communicate. ) There are five types of schema that help us classify others.
Physical constructs classify people according to their appearance, interaction constructs focus on social behavior, psychological constructs are for example, curious, nervous, insecure, and so on. The two constructs we usually don t focus on in a relationship are role constructs, which are like you status, such as wife, attorney, student, etc. , and member constructs. Member constructs would be like a group that you belong to, for example Republican, Democrat, or a local school board. The article Falling in Love Again has affected my perception of relationships. It made me realize that there are those inner qualities that drive people crazy, in everybody.
It also made me realize that there are many ways to deal with this. Not dealing with this can cause relationship damage, which is something I do not want. I want to communicate to my wife, to let her know, that our relationship is something I treasure, and so I will do my part to make it work. Selecting the right solutions to make a relationship work can be difficult. Focusing on all the qualities of a person, instead of selecting what you want in a person can be difficult also. However, it can be done according to Diane Felmlee Ph.
D. , Professor of Sociology at the University of California-Davis. My second marriage is going to be alot bette because I m willing to communicate more. When I met my present wife, I was not looking to meet anyone.
After I got to know her, I knew that I really loved her and all her qualities both good and bad. When we have problems, we know how to communicate, and we never go to bed mad. My interpretation of my relationship with my wife is excellent. If our qualities bother each other, we find a solution to the problem. My wife has all the contrasts that I could ever want. I feel that makes her a well-rounded person.
Relationships... first we love, then we should love later, after we get to know all the hidden qualities.