... I couldn't let all that go back to where it was... ." (163) Sethe loves her children. But it's that 'selfish pleasure' which makes one question her actions. Sethe is living a life she's never known a life of freedom, freedom from brutality, from fear, and from pain. In killing her daughter she saved herself, for the second time.
Sethe was still free, and she wasn't going back to Sweet Home, or to School Teacher no matter what the cost. Sethe's children were a part of her, and they were a part she was not going to submit to slavery. They needed to be protected, because the loss of them meant the loss of Sethe herself. When Sethe saw School Teacher coming she "collected every bit if life she had made, all the parts of her that were precious and fine and beautiful, and carried, pushed, dragged them through the veil, out away, over there where no one could hurt them." (163) Sethe sees no wrong here because it as though she were killing herself. Saving herself from all the terror she had already known.
It was an act of love, and an act of primordial instinct. Sethe's needed to protect her babies because her mother didn't protect her. Sethe never bonded or connected with her mother, and as a result she devoted her life solely to her children. Sethe's mother "went back in rice and [Sethe] sucked from an other woman whose job it was" (60). Sethe and her mother never had the intimate bond between mother and daughter, therefore Sethe was hollow inside. It wasn't until she had her own children that life and love filled within her.
Sethe's children were her lifelines, and she needed them to survive. But Sethe was not going to live her life in shackles, so she could not let her children do so. The only way to be prevented from going back into slavery would be to end her life, and she did through her daughter, Beloved. Beloved was Sethe.
This nameless child, who was buried under the headstone "Beloved," was christened on her burial. Sethe had heard the preacher say the words 'dearly beloved, 'in his prayer, and thus derived her name. (5) However, the preacher in saying these words is talking to the spectators. Sethe was the dearly beloved, and thus Beloved was named after Sethe. Not only was Sethe and Beloved connected by blood, they were connected in name. And Beloved became the embodiment of Sethe.
So it could be felt that Sethe had killed herself when escaping from School Teacher. Sethe said clearly that she would not go back to him, or to slavery, and in fright and hysteria, Sethe killed herself. Sethe does not in effect die in a physical sense but she dies in an emotional sense. She since detaches herself, and lives once again as though she were hollow.
Like in childhood, she has once again lost her bond. Sethe, therefore, feels she does not have to justify her actions. Sethe escaped. With Beloved's return, Sethe can release all the guilt her conscious has laid upon her. And effect repents for her sin. "I'll explain to her, even though I don't have to.
Why I did it. How if I hadn't killed her she would have died and that something I could not bear to happen to her. When I explain it she " ll understand, because she understands everything already. I'll tend to her as no mother ever tended a child, a daughter. Nobody will ever get my milk no more except my own children... Now I can look at things again because she's here to see them too." (201) Beloved provides Sethe with an outlet for her guilt.
By absorbing all her love, which should have been rightly directed at herself, Beloved is Sethe's denial of freedom. Sethe's guilt will not allow her to love herself, or let herself be loved. Sethe's conscience is the ghost that plagues her house. When Paul D first enters the house, Sethe almost lets the "responsibility of her breasts, at last [be] in somebody else's hands" (18).
As soon as this thought occurs, the ghost attacks and wreaks havoc, the only remedy for which was its expulsion by Paul D. Sethe's conscious, manifested in the ghost, wouldn't allow her to be freed by Paul in his way. Through Sethe's attempts to lessen her guilt and difficult past, she ironically worsens it. By letting Paul D sleep in the house, Sethe begins to overcome her guilt and let go of her punishment subsequently Beloved begins to fall apart. It is not until Sethe, has to decide between Paul D and Beloved that we understand her grief.
Paul D was to be her only savior and she rejected him, to endure her penance. Sethe does not want forgiveness; she wishes only to punish herself in order to mollify the pain of her past. Sethe's guilt is her hollowness and her selfishness. Selfish because although she has saved them from an institution she fears, she has avoided the actual physical death that she inflicted upon her children. Once killing Beloved, her best thing, Sethe realizes that she will never again be whole, and in effect she will never loose her feelings of guilt. Sethe knows that killing her daughter was wrong.
And she also knows that killing her was right. She killed Beloved because she wanted freedom and she wanted her daughter to have freedom. Beloved is the embodiment of Sethe, torturing her for love, like Sethe tortures herself because she does not. Her love from her children is presented when she would choose to kill them rather then allow them to be broken by an evil institution. Love is Sethe's primary motivation for killing her children. However, her selfish fault lies in the fact that she shifted the focus of responsibility from herself to the institution that has spawned her.
Ultimately, it is Sethe who is responsible for her murder not slavery. Sethe kills her daughter to demonstrate her love. She exhibits her selfish pride by rejecting her own guilt. All of the characters try to repress their memories, which need to be faced and exorcised as you would a ghost. The end of this novel emphasizes the importance of the community and the individual's search for self, which characterizes the survival struggle of Black Americans. Sethe is destroyed by her memories and her isolation with the ghost of Beloved, (representing the memories of slavery) until the community intervenes and saves her.
The black community and their cohesiveness and harmony is an essential factor to further the healing of 244 years of slavery and another 133 years of political abuse. When presented the notion that Sethe, not her children, is her own "best thing", her reply takes form of a question, "Me? Me?" (273) Sethe has realized that she has loved her children too much, and herself not enough. WORKS CITED Morrison, Toni. Beloved.
Maine: Thorndike, 1987. Louisiana Black Code of 1865 Hart, Albert Bushnell. Slavery and Abolition. New York: Negro Universities Press, 1906. Clinton, Catherine. Half Sisters of History.
Duke University Press, 1994.