Sex and Singles "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow" Many people feel that having casual sex is a way to fulfill a person's sexual needs and desires, without the hassle of a commitment. Yet, many people, often women, have a tendency to wonder if the person that they are having casual sex with, cares about them, loves them, or respects them. Many women may feel this way because of the emotional attachment they get when giving themselves to another person. However, it can be a double standard. Some men may also feel this way.
The truth is I do not believe that a person that gives himself or herself to another person, in the form of intercourse, is respected or loved unless they are in a relationship with their sexual partner. True, their casual sex partner may care for them, or again, they may not. I think it really depends on the situation, and with whom they are having casual sex. However, in my own personal experiences, I have never found any respect or love. In Chapter 7 of our text "Marriages and Families" the authors talk briefly about casual sex, and if a person will be respected the next day. They justify this by saying, "Maybe" however, a person that experiences casual sex in the single life, may differ in opinion.
I personally have been the victim of this non- respectful act, several times. I may only speak for myself but I am sure that I am not the only person that has experienced this. I have had casual sex with people that I really liked and cared for, and when engaging in sexual intercourse, I was under the impression that my partners felt the same way. However, afterwards, or as the text says "the next day" I was not contacted again. There was no love or respect from these casual sex experiences, only lies to get what they wanted.
Did these partners say that they loved me, and cared for me before I gave in, and gave myself to them? Of course they did beforehand, in which is the case for many people that have casual sex with another person, without being in a relationship. Our text also justifies my experience by stating twenty years ago, both men and women felt that it was ok to have sexual intercourse with a person that they liked. However, today, less people feel as strongly about that statement as before. I feel the reason for this change comes from experiences that people have had, just like my own. The text also says that men have double standards.
They feel that a woman that has casual sex or is sexually permissive, are not acceptable for long-term relationships, or marriage partners. The reason this may be is that a man may feel that a woman that would give herself to any man, without pursuing a relationship with him first, does not have respect for herself; therefore, they do not have respect for the woman. Many people in today's society have casual sex because it fulfills their needs without a commitment, which may I add many people these days are afraid of having. However, though what is ok for one person is not ok for another. A man may think that casual sex means nothing more than getting himself off, and never having to worry about seeing the other person again, whereas a woman is probably lying there wondering when she will get to see him again. Times have definitely changed over the past twenty years, and women's roles in society have increasingly changed as well.
It is common for a woman to gain pleasure from a casual sex experience and think of it as nothing more than that. However, for the most part, male or female, casual sex partners do not care, or respect you. A casual sex partner means that you have sex with the person casually whenever you need to fulfill a need, not a place in your heart..