Communicating Needs example essay topic

Jessica Turner When A Man Loves A Woman This is a movie that has many real-life relationship problems in it. Alice, the main character has an alcohol problem and because of her problem, she puts her entire family through many hard times. There are four things that can harm a relationship the most, and all of them are done by Alice. At first Alice starts to criticize Alex.

She gives him a hard time for many things, including his character. She is hurtful in telling him that he is not doing the right things and that he is making situations worse. She then goes into a state of contempt. She raises her voice, blows smoke in his face, as if she were disgusted by him and goes out of her way to make snide comments. She is using this tactic so much that eventually it starts to dictate how Michael acts around her. By this time Alice is in such bad shape that she reverts to being defensive.

When something goes awry instead of taking it with a grain of salt, she escalates the situation and makes it into something much larger. She becomes very reactive and unapologetic. Her final step in harming her marriage is stonewalling. Alice starts to pull away from Michael and his love. He wants to help her, but she is not ready to accept that yet. She makes is difficult for the entire family to heal by doing this.

She becomes withdrawn and pushes away those who love her. These things are very are very apparent in this couple's relationship. The communication between the two main characters in this movie was poor. Many things may have been avoided if situations were just talked about differently. If Alice had been able to send "I-Messages" to Michael things may have gone a bit smoother. As an alcoholic it is not always easy to tell others your true feelings.

She needed to tell Michael how she felt, believed and wanted from their relationship. Also if Michael could have been more responsive to Alice and her emotions. It takes a lot of understanding to deal with substance abusers and he tries his best, but that was not the only thing he should have done. He needed to give Alice more feedback. Alcoholics need praise, almost like children. They need to know that the other person is receiving the message and understands where those feelings are coming from.

They both need to work on being assertive. It is a great thing when two people can communicate with each other but the communicating needs to be done in a f good way. Many times, instead of speaking calmy and rationally, the couple screamed and fought. good communication lines come from feeling respected and heard. They also needed to work on showing their feelings and ideas in a non-abrasive way, being positive and respectful is key in a good relationship..