Domestic And Interpersonal Life Of The Home example essay topic

Since the traditional conceptions of masculinity and femininity define man as instrumental and woman as expressive, then it follows that men and women can function in their traditional roles only in conjunction with each other. Each requires the other in order to perform at their peak in the world. A man is incomplete without nurturing and tenderness and when he cannot find these qualities within himself he becomes dependent on the woman in his life to provide them. A woman cannot function well without the self-assertiveness and leadership that she, if traditionally feminine could not develop within herself. For these qualities she becomes dependent on a man. Neither can stand alone and this relationship is formalized within the institution of marriage.

Once the relationship is established, tasks and behaviors are assigned along sex-oriented lines. The woman becomes the wife and mother with certain tasks and the man accordingly becomes the husband and father with his own set of prescribed tasks and behaviors. In this relationship, powers are divided rather than shared. The man is allocated the power to make important decisions, achieve status, and material goods. On the other hand, assumes the power to feel, nurture, serve and manage domestic and interpersonal life of the home. Women thus gain power in private in exchange for submission in public.

This is the traditional bargain struck between the two sexes. With the acceptance of the role of wife almost all women, especially role-oriented women, accept as well as the role of housewife. The deprecatory phrase "I'm just a housewife" typifies the low esteem in which this position is held in our society. The housewife's responsibilities fall under at least twelve occupational titles: nursemaid, housekeeper, seamstress, dietician, cook, dishwasher, laundress, food buyer, chauffer, gardener, practical nurse, and maintenance worker. However, she receives no pay and has to ask her husband for money for basically everything. It is remarkable that most women still rush to fill such a position.

The traditional housewife's main task is putting the interests of her husband and her children first. Her central mission in life is to care for her husband and children, and finds her major satisfaction in her family. In addition, for the traditional wife individual achievement is proscribed though she may help bring in the family income if it should become necessary; it should not exceed her husband's salary. She believes, moreover, that psychologically and biologically women are better suited for some tasks than others, but that the family domain does not include sharing equal authority with her mate. Women within the domestic sphere, become more, more emotional, and more willing to live through the lives of others at the same time as they begin to lose the independence and achievement orientated skills they might have developed through prior education and training. The role of wife and mother isolates most women from any meaningful contact with the outside world.

She holds the secondary position to her husband's, who controls all the tangible rewards and acknowledgements of labor. The housewife lives in a private world dominated by family, children, and an occasional neighborhood tie. She also learns to be flexible instead of goal oriented, to be responsive rather than decisive. Moreover, the woman expects to find her major satisfactions in her marriage. Her happiness is limited to the boundaries within her marriage.

Women are a wear that they are expected to be good wives and mothers and have been told that, if they fulfill these duties well they will achieve a great sense of satisfaction. They are taught early the real satisfaction are to be gained in forgetting themselves and serving others. Therefore, women who are striving to be good wives and mothers can convince themselves that they are also reaping the rewards of such applications. If a woman finds no such rewards from domestic life she is convinced that something is wrong with "her", not with the role she is playing. If something is wrong with her then she must try harder - and she does. And little by little she manages to convince herself that she is happy On the other hand, the husband's role is that of bread winner and financial provider.

As husband the man is in charge of the financial and decision making aspect of the household. Unlike women, men are traditionally inept in the interpersonal sphere. They are not in touch with their feeling or, if they are, they are threatened by expressing them. They have not developed interpersonal resources that allow them to be responsive and flexible in an unstructured interpersonal situation. Instead of developing within themselves capacity for interpersonal relationships, men have assigned women all of the skills in this important area of living. First, development of such capabilities by men would imply that they are neither busy nor successful enough in the "real world".

Second, the development of emotional responsiveness posses a threat to man who wishes to see themselves as strong and invulnerable. Men, none the less, recognize the importance of emotional interpersonal sensitivity and in order to preserve their own invulnerability and yet preserve these characteristics they assign such capabilities to women. Similarly, the ability to care for themselves and their homes has not been developed in most men, in such tasks, which they none the less regard as necessary for their own well being are disdained as "woman's work" - the chores of the inferior sex. Undertaking the responsibilities of the housewife for many men is again an admission of failure, a sign announcing inadequacy in doing men's work, which, if successful and profitable, would no doubt keep them to busy for insignificant tasks.

Men do, however, develop traits often not found in women. In their competitive world men enhance their own logic and rationality and they learn top deal with problems, not people, as they inch their way up the latter of status and prestige external supports in this world are strong and rewards are tangible. They seldom have to wonder if their labor is or is not noticed, appreciated, or of value. At the same time as men's energies are engaged in this competitiveness they tend top lose touch with their own emotions of with those of others. They are not interested in vital interpersonal communication when they return home after a day's work. Overworked and preoccupied they desire only relief from those they have left at the office.

Very much in need of emotional support they still regard the interpersonal facet and life as secondary to the major business..