Love Bloat By Andrew Sullivan example essay topic
The love that our culture teaches us to thrive for is nothing more than pure infatuation. Our culture often gives us the idea that this great infatuation is supposed to have rewards seen in movies such as the Wedding Planner. So many movies today place emphasis on the fairytale endings. Whether it is that the couple is separated worlds apart or somebody is getting in the way, the idea portrayed through such endings is that no matter what happens that everything always turns out perfectly. With our culture concentrating so much on the benefits and rewards of this untrue romance, we often forget to realize the downsides. We don't seem to remember the empty feeling it leaves with us when the romance is over, nor do we remember all the times we " ve been hurt before.
We don't realize how diverting this romance can be to anyone and everyone. Sullivan said "It diverts us with phony adrenaline, teases us with jealousy, hooks us with sex [... ] It is so diverting that we tend to forget more pressing questions, like what to believe in or strive for" (609). All the people in our culture can see the things Sullivan expresses are extremely realistic and possible to happen. Unfortunately our culture is so caught up with the idea that they won't get hurt. The intelligent people in our culture can even be overtaken by the deceptive feeling of infatuate love.
People such as Sullivan who use intimidating words and quotes from famous authors of the 19th century, proving him to be a very well educated man. In the sense of this romance everyone is on the same level. The young, old, rich, poor, intelligent, and all the in between are all capable of the same feelings that come along with infatuation. The sarcasm, pessimism, and realism are constant attitudes Sullivan uses throughout his essay suggesting he also felt the burn at one time or another. He is a romantic who wants to believe in romance, but has experienced the downside, making him resentful, and bitter. The way he contradicts all the highs of the romance perceived by our culture with the reality of how things really are according to him, is due to bitterness alone.
Sullivan, with such a strong stand point and firm belief on this subject can be described in one word; lonely. A romance that is not real is the kind many people experience, often leaving them lonely, only to keep searching for this love our culture teaches us is the answer. They are yet to realize that as Sullivan states, it "conquers nothing... It contains neither the friendship nor civility that makes marriage successful" (609). Only when people understand this, will they know the success fulness of being happy is not dependant on this unreal infatuation, but on the small things in life. The small things, such as true feelings like friendship and affection, are keys to happiness.
Loneliness after all isn't the only alternative to 'love'. Sullivan, Andrew. "The Love Bloat". Literature for Composition, 6th ed. Ed. Sylvan Barnet.
New York: Longman, 2003.608-609.