Places The Male Species example essay topic
So here are some insights into our behaviors, eating habits, and our rituals to let you understand us better during these times. One of the main rituals on Sundays is gathering of us male species at various places to be with others like us. One of the places the male species often go to are called bars. These places are like heaven to the male specie. I myself have had first hand experiences with these places. Last Sunday I decided to go to a local bar call Hooters with some of my buddies to observe these ritual behaviors for myself.
Upon entering the bar, I knew that it was truly a place for us males to hang out. The walls were filled with sport memorabilia, and on all twelve television sets where either football games or other sport related things. Another thing that made it a true guys' hang out were the good food and the waitresses. All of the waitresses were all shaped nicely, wearing provocative clothing which made them truly candy for the eyes. Another one of these places that we male species like to socialize is their own dwellings or another's. When the male specie hang out they don't like to do it alone, and so others males would join in on the fun.
There are also requirements in order for the visiting males to be included in this ritual; they must present a "Gift of Flavor" upon the visit. Although we male species will consume almost anything that might be digestible on most days, Sundays on the other hand we male species will follow a strict diet. The diet states that, only food products that contain either great amount of salt, cheese, meat, or sugar may be consumed. Also that each serving of these foods must contain no less than 2 grams of fat, otherwise the food is considered sacrileges. Also the most essential part of these rituals are alcoholic beverages, because it seems that alcohol brings out theses primal instincts even more, therefore bonding them even better. In very few cases, sometimes the opposite sex has been known to attend these strictly male rituals.
The female species who attend these rituals are there to present a more heterosexual atmosphere to the gathering. So please don't try to invite yourself, if we want you to come we will invite you. At these places males are very loud and obnoxious High fives, hand shakes and group chants are a common sight at these places. But there is a mutual respect among us on Sundays; we don't do things that will upset other males, at least not on purpose.
No one goes out to these gatherings to look for trouble, because all males believe that Sundays are a time for peace. Sometimes fights do break out between males, but these incidents are very few. Those who break this unwritten code are banned from such rituals for how ever long it is required Other strange behaviors that Sundays tend to bring out in the male species are the overwhelming urge to fix everything he owns. This urge can be both helpful and harmful depending on the subject. Helpful because things males own will get fix, but harmful because this urge also come out in males that doesn't have a clue on how to fix anything. This urge emerges because of the male species' need to feel needed and masculine.
Males believe that in order to truly be a man he must be able to do thing that the opposite can not do, mainly fix things and hard labor. This behavior is often accompanied by alcohol as well; it also has the purpose of letting the male species concentrate and have fun. So just let us fix our things even if it doesn't need to be fixed, it would help our self-esteem. But some males of the specie can get the total opposite sex of this behavior, and is often referred to as sloth. This behavior often causes late sleeping, for that day the male species are able to slumber for hours beyond his usual time of waking up. But this chronic sleep always seems to be canceled by the male's inner clock when he senses the pre-game show is about to start.
It doesn't stop there. Even though they have awakened for their slumber, we are still in a trance like state of mind. The ones that go through this trance have been know to sit or lay motionless for hours watching nothing but sports and pointless infomercials on television. We only move when it is an extremely necessary situations, like in a life or death situation, call of nature, lack of nourishment, or commercials. But don't think that when we are moving that we will do anything else except for the extreme situations.
But also, do not mistake our inactivity for unawareness. Even though it seems like our minds seem like they are blanked we can sense all that is around us the entire time. We just don't want to talk to you. So just let it be. Some males are not like this at all. They retain their sanity through out the entire week, because they have a disorder that is often referred to as P. W syndrome.
You can spot these males easily; they " re often seen at local malls on Sundays accompanying the opposite sex during their shopping. Another tells tale sign of P. W Syndrome is the answering of every woman's commands with "yes" followed bye a stupid pet name. If you have a man like this, you can do better. There are no definite set times when all these primal instincts will go away but there are time frames when these behaviors will start to decrease. People have noticed that they start to decrease after the last post game show on television had ended and football too is gone for the day. But some scientists believe that availability of alcohol plays a major part in the decrease, because the party is over when the drinks are gone.
The only way that you can make it easier on you during these times is to just go with the flow. Be lazy too or fix things, by doing this you will notice that the time will fly by. Or you can pick up our hobbies, like football, drinking beer and hot wings. Because if we see that you " re cool we will invite you to our gatherings. But if think that doing these are not for you, you can just stay the hell away from us.
Go to your parents' house, girl friends', or siblings' and do your feminine activities. We won't interfere with your rituals. But please understand it's not our fault, we don't do this because we want to, it just that it is part of being a man. And I hope in reading this you have learned and understand more about the men in your life. And that it's up to you to decide how it will affect you.