Three Days That Nic example essay topic

I prayed with all my heat that it wasn't true, but when I opened my eyes I discovered the truth as my heart broke into a million pieces. As I looked at the two pink lines I thought about my life and how this news was about to destroy me. It was a Wednesday in October when I rushed to Wal-Mart and then home. I knew my parents wouldn't be there-they never were on Wednesdays.

As soon as I had realized my worst fear had come true, I left. I wasn't expected to be home that day; I had told my parent's I would be with Nic until church that night. I probably drove around aimlessly for about two and a half hours before finally going to church. I knew Nic wouldn't be there yet-he had to work that day. I waited fore what seemed to be forever for him to show up. I sat in my car and cried, cried like a baby.

I hadn't been able to cry before then; be emotions had been so shot. I couldn't think straight at all. When Nic finally arrived, only about thirty minutes later, I broke down again as I told him. We had only been dating about five months then, yet I knew he was going to take care of me. But how on earth could I tell my friends, much less my parents? After I calmed down, Nic and I talked about our options: abortion, adoption, or raising it on our own.

Right away I knew that raising it would be out of the question. I didn't want to spend the first few years of my adult life as a mother. I also ruled out adoption. I selfishly didn't want this child to be born at all. I didn't want my parents or anyone else to know anything about this horrible occurrence. I told Nic that I wanted to have an abortion.

It's so funny how something can seem so dark and wrong until you are actually faced with the situation. Though Nic didn't like the idea, he told me he would stand by me no matter what my choice. We began our journey towards abortion. Nic did the research for me, finding out all that was included in abortion. We spent almost two months saving the $500. However, when I finally had a weekend to go in, along with the cash to pay for it, I called in only to discover that, as a minor without parental consent, a legal abortion would be impossible.

I cried for hours that day. I knew then that I would have to tell my parents. I told Nic that I would tell them after Christmas. About a week before Christmas I broke down and told them. It had been too hard not to tell them and I was tired of the stress. My mom and I cried for the longest time that night before she instructed me to go wait in my bedroom while she spoke to my dad.

He came in my room and we cried some more. They both told me that, though they were disappointed, they still loved me. I was as honest with them as possible as I told them I had attempted an abortion because I hated this child and wanted him to suffer as much as I was. As I look back on those first few months, I thank God that the abortion did not work out.

Although it seemed like an easy decision at the time, I know now that I would look back and weep that I had killed my child. My parents and I went to a Christian adoption agency. The caseworker who helped us, Emily, was extremely kind, understanding, and helpful. About eight months into my pregnancy we met the wonderful couple, Brian and Tami, who would raise our child as their own. I must admit that I have hated them at times for being so ready for the child that I was not capable of raising. However, I know that they will raise my son to the best of their abilities, with God as the focal point of his life.

A huge struggle my family, Nic, and I uncovered was our financial situation. After being denied Medicaid, my mom and I visited a hospital we heard might help us. The only thing they could offer was a plan that would cover all of my bills for $3000. The adoption agency would reimburse us for the medical bills but not until the child had been placed. Nic and I would be forced to produce the money up front, something we were not prepared to do.

The same week my mom and I discovered the package at the hospital I got into a car accident. It wasn't serious but it cost about $2300 to repair my car and about $1000 to repair the car I hit. Now I was out about $6000 and had no car for awhile. Needless to say, I was getting incredibly stressed out. Finally things began to look up.

My mom discovered a great midwife clinic. The nurse midwives there are sensational. They agreed to allow me to pay minimal expenses only and to bill the adoption agency for the rest of the expenses after the baby had been placed. Furthermore, I was able to deliver at my first choice of hospitals where I received excellent care.

The week of June 16, 2003 I was placed in the hospital due to a high-risk pregnancy. I was not due until the 27th so my mom and I enjoyed the visit as much as possible. Eight days later I was induced. After 15 hours of labor, I had a cesarean and a wonderful 7 lbs. 14 oz. baby boy. The three days That Nic, Logan and I spent in the hospital where so very short and quick.

I honestly don't remember many of the details of the visit, I only remember the birth and afterwards from stories I hear. I only remember my baby's face because of the pictures I have. It makes things harder to deal with. I want to be able to hold my baby. To see him again, to feel his breath on my cheek.

I wrote him a letter telling him how much I love him so that he will never forget that his real mommy cares. No one could have warned me about the hurt and pain I feel. I love Logan so very much and placing him in Tami's arms was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life but I know that it was the right thing to do. A piece of my heart will always and forever be with him I anxiously wait the day that I will be able to see him again and tell him in person "I love you, my son. I love you, I love you, I love you... .".