Who's Coming To Dinner Joanna Drayton example essay topic

1,850 words
Guess Who's Coming to Dinner Joanna Drayton returns unexpectedly from Hawaii to announce her engagement to an intelligent, accomplished, world traveling doctor. The only problem with the intended union is that he is African American and she is white. The Drayton's come face to face with their own principles and realize that their daughter is the way they brought her up to be - non-prejudicial. Turmoil and anxiety ensue as Joanna insists that her parents give their approval by the end of the night. A dinner with both sets of parents follows, where the parents must come to terms with the bi-racial marriage. This film gives an insightful look into the realities of interracial marriage and proves to be useful in examining the components of interpersonal relationships.

Communication apprehension is a nervousness, an unwillingness to communicate. It refers to anxiety about communication interaction. People who develop negative feelings and predict negative results as function of engaging in communication interactions suffer from this. John exhibits the afore described apprehension when he communicates with his parents. A specific example from the film would be when he speaks with them on the telephone and tells them about Joanna and his plans to marry her. He chooses to omit the fact that Joanna is white.

He avoids telling his parents this because he fears their reaction to the information. He mentions he will write to them on the way to Geneva about the details; however, his plans are foiled when Joanna invites them over to dinner and he is forced to face it head on when they pick them up from the airport. Joanna puts on a facade of optimism, assuring John that her parents see nothing of color - after all she was brought up under liberal parents who taught her color of skin was nothing of concern. In all actuality she was slightly nervous about exposing the information.

She chooses first to tell her mother about the outstanding accomplishments and qualities of John, attempting to get her to accept him for the person he is before revealing to her the seeming minuscule difference. Joanna doesn't actually tell her mother that John is of a different origin before he enters the room, surprising her. When a culture is transmitted from one generation to another, we call it enculturation. This is a process by which you learn the culture into which you were born. People develop an ethnic identity, a commitment to the beliefs and philosophy of their culture. Parents, religious groups, as well as peer groups can all be teachers of culture.

Tillie, the housekeeper, had a surprising reaction to the situation at hand. When she hears the news of the marriage she pulls John aside and makes several disturbing comments. The first was about, "a member of my own race getting above himself", and "civil rights is one thing, this something else". Her behavior depicts that she could of been brought up to believe that the white race was above the black race. Her response was different from that of the two sets of parents, whom only seemed concerned due to the external problems the union would induce. Interpersonal communication tends to be a series of punctuated events.

Punctuation is the tendency to divide communication transactions into sequences of stimuli and responses. Usually people punctuate continuous sequences of events into stimuli and responses to make a situation more convenient. How a person punctuates, or interprets a situation is crucial to interpersonal understanding. John is a practical, intelligent man and foresees the problems that may arise from their interracial marriage. He understands Joanna's parents fears and concerns for their daughter's welfare.

He agrees not to go through with the marriage unless they approve. He loves Joanna and desires to marry her, however he doesn't want her to do damage to her relationship with her parents in the process. The two mothers in the film were shocked at first, however they did accept the news fairly quickly and immediately tried to see the situation from the couple's perspective. They remember all to well what it was like to be young and in love.

They approve of the marriage as loving, supportive mothers. In the end, after re-examining his own liberal beliefs and considering all aspects of the situation, Mr. Drayton has a change of heart. He ultimately decides that the love between the two should overcome and take priority over the prejudices and opinions of others. In the final scene he relates the love between Joanna and John to that of him and his own wife, revealing that he has not forgotten what love truly is.

The psychological reaction you experience when you " re in a culture or atmosphere very different from your own is referred to as culture shock. Anthropologist Kalervo Oberg noted that it occurred in stages that were useful for examining encounters with the new and different. Each character from the film exhibited culture shock in different stages. Mrs. Drayton was surprised at the arrival of Joanna and shocked at the sight of John, not expecting him to be black as well as have a marriage imminent.

Her period of crisis was relatively short. She recovered and adjusted quickly, accepting the couple's plans to be married. Christina couldn't help but be happy for them when she saw how in love they were. She also had to appreciate her daughter's own willfulness and determination for this union to be a positive experience for both families. Mrs. Prentice's reaction was fairly similar to Mrs. Drayton's. She saw her son more alive then he had been since his first wife and son died in a train accident.

The mothers seem to agree that this love between the two will not be struck down by disapproval - merely inhibited. Acceptance was the clear route to follow. The first meeting between Mr. Drayton and John seemed promising. He grew to like John in short period of time and was almost enchanted with the prospect of this well-known, accomplished, successful doctor.

As the film progressed he entered the crisis stage and appeared to be stuck in that mode until the end of the film where he gave his speech in the final scene. He pondered the effects of the marriage and the hardships the couple would endure, completing the stages of recovery and adjustment when he finally approves. Mr. Prentice's reaction to the situation was shock and frustration with the couple's choice. Was their love strong enough to endure the hardships that lie ahead for a bi-racial marriage? He was stuck in the crisis stage for the majority of the film just as Mr. Drayton was. After the heated conversation with his son I believe he started the stage of recovery.

It is assumed he adjusted to the idea. Tillie gave the impression that she was held fast in the crisis stage during the film in its entirety. Her reaction is never really explained, nor her stance clarified. It is unknown if she progressed to recovery or adjustment from the culture shock. A symmetrical relationship is when two individuals mirror each other's behavior. Mrs. Drayton and Mrs. Prentice take on this form of a relationship.

They both remember what it was like to be young and in love. To see their children so happy, simply makes them happy. Both understand the difficulties the couple will face together, even if Joanna does not yet realize it. They are fully aware that it would be far more devastating for the relationship to end.

Their approval is given knowing their husbands will accept it eventually. Mr. Drayton and Mr. Prentice also take on a symmetrical relationship. At first they cannot get past how damaging the relationship 'could be' due to the differences in their pigmentation. They fail to see the love between the two - the determination and commitment strong enough to stand and face the cruelty of the world. A complementary relationship is when two individuals engage in different behaviors. John and Joanna appear to have this.

Joanna is extremely positive and optimistic about the marriage and the reaction of the parents. She is sure they will be supportive of their decision and refuses to think otherwise. She gives the impression that she has no concerns or worries. John takes on the role of being more practical about the relationship, facing reality squarely. He loves her dearly, however realizes the obvious difficulties that lie ahead. He constantly tries to put the parent's point of view into perspective.

The Drayton's portray a complementary relationship as well. While Mrs. Drayton takes the news as if, "give me a moment and I'll be alright", Mr. Drayton has his doubts and voices them - unwilling to give his approval for the marriage so quickly. The Prentice's relationship is complementary and very similar to that of the Drayton's. Husbands and wives each take separate stances on the subject. Masculine cultures tend to emphasize success and socialize the people to be ambitious, assertive and competitive. These types will confront conflict directly, and competitively fight out differences.

Feminine cultures tend to emphasize the quality of life and socialize the people to be modest. They recognize the importance of close interpersonal relationships and lean more towards compromise or negotiation to resolve conflicts. I do not believe each family represents either masculine or feminine. The members of the families display aspects of feminine and masculine cultures, but not each in its entirety. For example, John takes on the role of the feminine culture because he states he will not marry Joanna unless her parent's approve, attempting to use compromise and negotiation to come to a solution. Joanna takes on the role of the masculine culture because she expects her parents to approve and deliberately confronts the conflict by inviting John's parents over for dinner.

She faces the situation head on, without reservation - forcing both sets of parents to deal with the decision directly. Interracial marriages are quite common in the now, however this film is still relevant in the present. Apart from the fact that prejudices still exist today and probably will for a long time, I am sure that many parents would have similar reactions and thoughts as the parents in this film had. Guess Who's Coming to Dinner served as an excellent tool for me to connect the information from the text book with real life experiences. It adequately depicts numerous types of communication and communication skills, giving me a better understanding of the material.